Cover letters to Cleveland Bishop and Apostolic Nuncio regarding concerning information taught by pastoral minister

March 10, 2004

Archbishop Gabriel Montalvo
Apostolic Nuncio to United States of America
3339 Massachusetts Avenue, NW
Washington,DC20008

Most Reverend Gabriel Montalvo,

On behalf of local parishioners we are submitting to you the following documentation of serious dissent from Catholic faith being disseminated in the Cleveland Diocese some of which has the imprimatur of Bishop Anthony M. Pilla.

Sincerely yours,

David J. Webster

Save Our Church, P.O. Box 1404, Medina, OH 44258,  dwebster@saveourchurch.org
 

Bishop Anthony M. Pilla
1027 Superior Ave
Cleveland, OH 44114-2560
bishop@dioceseofcleveland.org

Your Excellency:

We are writing to advise you of our concerns about the information distributed and recommended by the Coordinator of Catholic Divorce Recovery regarding divorce, separation, and annulment.  Please see the attached outline sent to Gayle Cilimburg (Pastoral Associate at St. Christopher Parish,) in which we describe our observations and questions.
 
Of particular concern are the apparent inconsistencies between the Dioceses’ publications and those from our sacred Pastors at the Vatican. We would sincerely appreciate any help you could provide in clarifying the meaning of certain excerpts from the Catechism, canon law, the Pontifical Council for the Family, the Congregation for the Clergy, Vatican II, and from our Pope's teachings, which are all quoted inthemessage to Gayle Cilimburg.

1) If there is not an immediate danger, does canon 1153 §1 require one to get the approval from the local ordinary or ecclesiastical authority before separating from one's spouse? Who is this local ordinary or ecclesiastical authority? (1153 §1. If either of the spouses causes grave mental or physical danger to the other spouse or to the offspring or otherwise renders common life too difficult, that spouse gives the other a legitimate cause for leaving, either by decree of the local ordinary or even on his or her own authority if there is danger in delay.) 

2) What does canon 1153 §1 mean by the term too difficult, or according to another translation, the term unduly difficult?

3) According to the Catholic Church, if living with one's spouse does not threaten the souls or bodies of family members, does one have the right to get separated because one concludes (either independently or with the counsel from a local ordinary or ecclesiastical authority) that marriage is too hard when either of the spouses loses the feeling of love for the other, feels bored, disagrees on issues, has trouble communicating, wants to be with a new partner, doesn't experience the communion of life which they had expected, wants to believe the marriage is irretrievably broken down, disagrees on how to raise the kids, is tired of one's dull spouse or overactive spouse, is selfish, tired of one's passive spouse or controlling spouse, feels the one isn't being affirmed enough, or doesn't have an exciting enough sex life, and other such reasons?

4) Could it be a grave sin to move out of one's home, or force one's spouse to move out of the family home? If this could be a grave sin, under what circumstance would this occur?

5) Could it be a grave sin to seek or obtain a divorce from one's spouse?  If this could be a grave sin, under what circumstances?

6) Do you know anything about the North American Conference for Separated or Divorced Catholics NADCSC or the authors they recommend, Fr. Henry Fehren, and William J. Bausch? Are they reliable sources for trustworthy Catholic information regarding divorce, annulments, and the obligations of Catholics?

Besides those specific questions, we have other concerns and as Bishop we hope you can offer us some insight or direction.

 As we understanding it, the Church has taught about divorce: 1) For the child, his/her parents' divorce will be the most important and painful event in the years of his growth, the event that affects him/her most deeply. 2) Divorce is immoral because it introduces disorder into the family and into society. This disorder introduced by divorce brings grave harm to children traumatized by the separation of their parents, and often torn between them. 3) Children have the right to be loved, accepted and educated in a family. Parents are the ones who must create a family atmosphere animated by love and respect for God and man, in which the well-rounded personal and social education of children is fostered. Hence the family is the first school of the social virtues (and of the richest form of humanism) that every society needs. (Sources cited below)

When one spouse wants to get divorced, believes he has the right to get divorced, and thinks he is a likely candidate for annulment, and the other spouse desperately wants to keep the family together, the 'rights' of the first spouse are opposed to the 'rights' of the other spouse and children. Fifty years ago, the spirit of the civil divorce laws was similar to the spirit of canon 1153.1; no one could get divorced without proving the other spouse had done something wrong. The present civil laws allow one spouse to force divorce for any reason or no reason, and offer no protection to a spouse and children who are unjustly abandoned. According to the canon 1151, "Spouses have the obligation and the right to maintain their common conjugal life, unless a lawful reason excuses them." However, from a 'modern' perspective, any Catholic's divorce seems morally justified because virtually every marriage could be nullified if one party requested it. After divorce, the spouse who desperately wanted to keep the family together is placed the horrible position of not living with one's spouse and having no recourse, while church pastors, staff, and volunteers advise him/her not to be certain there ever was a valid sacramental marriage. In our opinion, the policy of only requiring annulment investigations before second marriages favors the "rights" of the person wanting the divorce over the rights of the abandoned spouse and children. Why isn't the church telling the spouse who wants to divorce that the marriage is most likely valid? Why isn't the church insisting the couple get the help needed to strengthen their troubled marriage? 

With the present system, we fear great scandal is being caused to children in divorced families. The church appears to say to these children, “Your divorcing parent has done nothing wrong, and we can't know if your parents even had a valid marriage until we let the local tribunal look for sophisticated latent psychological conditions, which will only occur if your Daddy or Mommy wants to marry a new person." What a horrible thing to say to a child about the sacrament of marriage! We fear these children and their unjustly abandoned parent’s hearts are being broken, their families are being torn apart, their trust in the church is being threatened, and we wonder if the church’s current procedures for applying its own law regarding separation, divorce and annulment enable these tragedies.

Pope Leo XIII's Encyclical, ARCANUM (On Christian Marriage) states,  "Marriage has God for its Author . . . . it ought not to be regulated and administered by the will of civil rulers . . . it is plainly absurd to maintain that even the very smallest fraction of such power has been transferred to the civil ruler. Let no one, then, be deceived by the distinction which some civil jurists have so strongly insisted upon - the distinction, namely, by virtue of which they sever the matrimonial contract from the sacrament, with intent to hand over the contract to the power and will of the rulers of the State. . . A distinction, or rather severance, of this kind cannot be approved; " (4) Supporting legal separation and civil divorce, without asking couples to seek annulment appears to sever the civil contract from the sacramental obligations and rights. Could the church enforce canon 1153.1 and require ecclesiastical approval for all Catholics who get separated, and require that couples have an annulment before they get separated or divorced?

If you have any wisdom to offer which would explain the existing church’s annulment procedures in light ofourreflections, the encyclical Arcanum, and canon law,wewould appreciate it. Welook forward to your reply.

May God give you peace, zeal, strength, courage, and wisdom as you execute your responsibilities as Bishop. Please send your response to David J. Webster, Save Our Church, P.O. Box 1404, Medina, OH 44258 who has organized this correspondence and is representing us.

Sincerely,

Concerned parishionersof yours of the Cleveland Diocese

cc: Archbishop Gabriel Montalvo, Apostolic Nuncio to United States of America

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Footnotes:

(1) Conclusions of the 15th Plenary Assembly of the Pontifical Council for the Family. Rome, 17-19 October 2002, Section III Consequences of divorce on children.  http://www.vatican.va/roman_curia/pontifical_councils/family/documents/rc_pc_family_doc_20021019_xv-plenary-conclusions_en.html

 (2) "Children, Springtime of the Family and Society", Pontifical Council for the Family, Jubilee of Families, Themes for Reflection and Dialogue in Preparation for the Third World Meeting of the Holy Father with Families, Rome, October 14-15, 2000, Section 9, Children, Orphans of Living Parents, Grave problems for children. http://www.vatican.va/roman_curia/pontifical_councils/family/documents/rc_pc_family_doc_20001014_rome-jubilee-of-families-preparatory-texts_en.html
 
(3) Ibid., Section 10, The Right of Children to Be Loved, Accepted and Educated in a Family, The school of humanity.

(4) Pope Leo XIII, Arcanum (On Christian Marriage), February 10, 1880, Section 19,20,23
http://www.ewtn.com/library/ENCYC/L13CMR.HTM